I'm Not Him
by RyanTyler2294
Summary: During a case Martin's past is brought to the light and Danny helps him through it. Warning Mention of child abuse


**This idea had been in my head for a while and I thought you guys might like it.**

**And for those of you who read Hard to Buy for For, the next xhapter is coming soon, I did not forget, but I have a lot on my plate right now so it may take a while longer.**

Danny looked across the office at Martin, trying to figure out how things had gone from bad to worse. Things had gotten so bad between them that Martin could barely look at him. Jack had even stopped sending them out together on cases.

It was sad the way things had turned out. It started out promising, it was after a really bad case and Martin had come over mostly for comfort.

The kid that they were chasing down that day was fifteen year old Trevor Washington. His father had reported him missing within two hours of his disappearance. It didn't take long to find the kid trying to hitchhike on the side of the road. But on the drive back Trevor seemed uneasy. Martin had picked up on it right away and had ended up talking with him in an interview room before his dad arrived to pick him up.

At this point even Jack had started to question Martin's intentions. The kid appeared to be a normal runaway, who probably left after not getting his way about something or the other, like most teens.

Martin started off the interview like they usually do, as a good cop, "Do you want to tell me why you ran away." Trevor kept his eyes on the table not allowing himself to make eye contact. "I don't think you were leaving just to leave, I think that you might have a pretty good reason for why you did what you did."

Trevor looked up briefly as to answer yes before looking back down.

"That bruise on your arm, when we picked you up you said that you got into a fight with someone on the street, but you don't look like the kind of kid that would cause trouble." Trevor still stayed silent. "If you don't tell me what's wrong I can't help you." Martin sighed outwardly, folding his hands on top of the table. "I know what you're going through, and I know that it's hard to talk about."

"You don't know anything," Trevor mumbled.

Danny and the rest of the team were watching on from the two way glass, trying to figure out what Martin was getting at.

"Your father," Martin started not missing the way Trevor twitched at the mention of his guardian. "He…reminds me of my father. Comes off nice enough to everyone else, but you know the truth. That he's really a monster, that he beats you just because he can. And just when you think it can't get any worse he says that he loves you and…" he stopped seeing Trevor tremble but he knew he had to continue, "And the one other time you escape you land yourself in foster care, and you find out that it's ten times worse than what you've already been through. So you saved up because you know you can't go to a friend's house because they don't understand what's going on."

"I can't go back there," Trevor's voice broke, "I can't."

"I know," Martin said in a low voice, "I know that it's painful but you need to tell me what happened, so I can report it."

"Where am I supposed to go after that? I won't survive in foster care."

"I called your grandfather, he's wants to take you in. He said that he hasn't seen you since you were five."

"He was the first one to notice something was wrong and my dad told him not to come back around," Trevor swallowed, "He been beating me and, and raping me since I was thirteen," he grabbed Martin's hand as he broke down into tears, "I can't go back there."

Danny was stunned hoping with all of his heart that Martin was just pretending to know what Trevor was going through instead of knowing first hand. But when Martin knocked on his door at the odd hours of the night looking dis-heaved and told him everything Victor had done to him throughout his childhood and teen years. Danny did the best he could to comfort him as he cried and cried eventually falling asleep in Danny's arms.

Martin woke up within the hour and tried to apologize for the intrusion but Danny had insisted that it was okay. He'll never be sure as to why Martin kissed him, all he knew was that Martin pulled back wide eyed and left, stumbling over his words as he made an excuses to leave.

When Danny tried to talk to Martin about it the next day, Martin all but ran, again. He wanted to comfort Martin to let him know that it was okay, that what happened to him doesn't define who he is today.

Maybe it was for his own selfish reasons. From the moment he saw Martin he knew he was the one. Danny had never been one to care about someone's gender, it was personality he was after. And Martin had proved to be the one person he could open up to and not be judge. And the other night he thought that what happened was a step forwards, especially when Martin kissed him, but now.

He was upset that Martin now seemed to be scared of him. He couldn't even be in the same room without Martin almost going into a panic attack.

But he wanted to help Martin. And he was going to.

It was late and Martin was still working as usual. Danny pulled his chair up next to him trying to ignore the way Martin flinched, "We need to talk," he said softly.

"If it's about the kiss then I'm sorry," Martin said quickly obviously wanting to leave.

"Kind of," he looked around noticing that there were people in the room with them, "You want to talk about it back at my place."

Martin looked skeptical at first, "Just to talk," Danny nodded, "Okay, let me grab my stuff."

Martin was still nervous when they sat on Danny's couch, a space between them. "I don't know why you left, well I have an idea, but I want you to talk to me about it."

"Why," Martin was defensive, all but curling in on himself.

"Because, I care about you Martin, more than you know and I want you to be able to trust me."

"It has nothing to do with you."

"Martin…"

"You can't understand," Martin said, "I like you I really do but me with a guy, it scares me."

"I scare you?"

"No," Martin stood up and moved away from the couch to look out the window, "No, the idea that I might turn out like him," he shuddered.

Danny suddenly understood, "Martin, just because you're gay doesn't mean that you'll be a pedophile. What your dad did to you doesn't define you."

"I know," Martin sighed, "That's what my therapist tells me but," he started to cry. Danny moved to hold him and Martin didn't resist. He leaned into it accepting the comfort. Martin all but collapsed in his arms, "I can't Danny, I can't…"

"You don't have to do anything, I just want to help you."

"I love you," Martin blurted out, "I've have for a while, but the thought of being with you scared me," he turned to face Danny kissing him desperately as if he needed to comfort. Danny was surprised to feel Martin pulling him into his bedroom. The next thing he knew he had Martin beneath him on the bed.

"Martin, we can't do this. You're not in your right mind."

Martin looked like he was about to cry, "I need this."

"It will only make things worse," Danny whispered rolling to lay next to him.

"Don't leave," Martin held onto him tightly, begging.

"I won't," Danny agreed taking Martin into his arm and kissing him gently on the forehead, feeling him starting to go lax in his arms as he finally found himself in a peacefull sleep.

**Fin**

**You know what to do, drop a review**


End file.
